I will not go into great detail about this but want to point out that my grandparents on both sides were active in church. They were Catholics, Episcopalians, and Presbyterians. I remember going to church a few times when I was young and have records showing that I was baptized Presbyterian. I had virtually no religious training. I did have very good parents.
When people would later ask me where I met Dawnie I would reply that I met her in the alley. That is a true story. “The Alley” was a bar and restaurant in Twin Falls, Idaho. I was coming out of the bar and she was in the restaurant. She was very pretty and I was definitely attracted to her and I think her to me. We visited briefly and exchanged phone numbers. I knew the owner of the restaurant and called him the next morning to inquire about Dawnie Bowen.
He knew her because she held her Sarah Coventry meetings there and had high praise for her. He strongly recommended that I should take her out. When he was telling me about her attributes, he mentioned how impressed he was with the way she took care of her children. I replied, “What children?” He explained that she was a widow with three children. I was ready to walk away but he reminded me that I was 30 years old and maybe I should reconsider. Then he told me she was a good Mormon. That did it. I was definitely not interested.
I tell this because it will help explain why it took me so long to accept the Gospel. When I met Dawnie she had fallen away from the Church after her husband’s death. As we did become interested in each other and carried on a long distance courtship, she never had any doubt that she planned to become active again with her three children. If we ever did get married she would not require that I join her church.
We lived in Great Falls and then Billings, Montana. I remember going to Church a few times in Billings. The girls, Laurie and Lisa became very active there. We moved to Evansville, Indiana where Dawnie and our children became very active. I started going to church there but not very regularly. We moved to Lisle, Illinois and we all started going to the Naperville, Ward. I went quite regularly and had a lot of people try to convert me.
I was stubborn but began to slowly soften. It was a slow process but eventually I gained a testimony that all of the things the Church claimed to be true, really were. This came about mostly through reason and logic but it was confirmed to me by the Holy Spirit. This was a brand new experience for me. Even so I was not sure I should join. I understood that if I was baptized I was making a long term commitment. I took any commitments seriously.
By almost any standards our lives were going very well. I had started as an $80.00 a week salesman for Swift & Co. in Pocatello, Idaho with a country sales route that took me each week into Southern Idaho and Western Wyoming. I lived in a $35.00 a month 10 x 12 room in some peoples basement with a shared bath. Now I was an Executive Vice-President working in the Ivory Tower (headquarters) in downtown Chicago. We had a beautiful home in a very nice airport community with a big hanger and airplane in our back yard. I had a wonderful family.
I could not understand how my joining the Church could cause my life or the life of my family to become any better. Still I prayed in earnest for a long time with no hint of an answer. I told this to Lisa who had encouraged me for a many years. She told me, “Dad, maybe you will have to have an experience like Joseph Smith had in the Grove.” I replied, “It will probably take something like that.” Little did I know that was exactly what was about to happen.
I was in Salt Lake City in the spring of 1985 and was in the process of completing the purchase of Elder Joseph B. Wirthlin’s meat distribution business. He was then a General Authority in the Church. We finished up signing the papers in his attorney’s office on aFriday afternoon and were planning to have dinner early that evening with his son Joe Jr., for a long time now a good friend of mine, and our Salt Lake branch manager.
I was planning on going to the motel and making some phone calls before dinner. Elder Wirthlin asked me if I would like to come over to his office in the Church office building. I was not enthused about that at all. He knew my situation and I was afraid he would get me in his office and put pressure on me to join the Church. I was surprised when the answer came out of my mouth that I would be happy to. Talk about small decisions that can change a life!
Well, Elder Wirthlin never put an ounce of pressure on me and we had a delightful conversation. At the time he had responsibility for the Church in South America. He told me about some of his experiences and asked about my family. Finally he looked at his watch and said, “I guess we had better start thinking about leaving to meet those guys for dinner, but first I have someone I would like to have you meet.” I replied in the affirmative.
We took the elevator up and walked down the hall to an office. As I recall the secretaries’ desk was inside on the right. Elder Wirthlin asked if whoever he came to see was in and the secretary replied that he was and motioned him to another office just on the left.
Elder Wirthlin said something like “If you have a few minutes I have a friend I would like to have you meet.” A booming voice replied, “Sure come on in.” Elder Wirthlin motioned me to come in and as I did, out walked Thomas S. Monson.
Of course I knew who he was. If you have ever walked in on a very important person and he did not know you were coming, and you did not know you were coming, you know how uncomfortable that can be. That feeling lasted for just a few seconds. Elder Wirthlin introduced me and explained that I worked for Swift & Co. and that he had just sold his business to us.
President Monson stuck out his hand and said something to the effect that, “Oh Swift &Co., I have an uncle that used to work for Swift in Ogden. “He is retired now and every year goes to the retirement party in Ogden and last year he asked me to go with him. He has become somewhat senile and started telling one of the officials from Chicago how they should run their business. I was really embarrassed.”
We talked about some of the Swift people in Ogden, as I had worked out of that plant when I was in Pocatello. I think we talked about a few other things in general. I glanced out of the corner of my eye and could see Elder Wirthlin, President Monson’s secretary, and another lady, standing there and watching and listening as President Monson and I talked like two old friends. I said to myself, “If my family could only see me know.”
When it came time to go, President Monson said, “Just a minute.” He went back into his office for a minute or two and came back out and handed me a book. It was his “Conference Classics” volume two. He had signed it. I still have it. As Elder Wirthlin and I were walking down the hall I thanked him for introducing me to President Monson. He turned to me and said, “He is a great man. He will lead this Church someday.” I had been in the company of two great men that day.
As I was riding on the airplane back to Chicago the next day, window seat on the right, and contemplating my experience of the day before, I heard a voice say very distinctly to me, “If that is not an answer to your prayers, what were you expecting?” When I got home I called Lisa and reminded her what she said about my having to have an experience like Joseph Smith had in the Grove. She asked if I had had one and I replied, “I had the next best thing.”
Although I knew I was going to join the Church, I put it off for at least a month. We were preparing to move from Naperville to Dallas and as I left the house one morning and got in the car to head to work, I realized I would be traveling and if I was going to be baptized in Naperville, which I planned on doing, time was getting short. I went back into the house and called to Dawnie and asked if she could arrange to have me baptized the next week.
The next Saturday she had made arrangements for my baptism and had the family assembled from far and wide. The three life changing events that have happened to me that will have an eternal influence on my posterity are, becoming an Army Ranger, I will explain this some other time, marrying Dawnie and adopting her three children, and being sealed in the Temple.
When we moved to Princeton, New Jersey the Stake President asked about my conversion and I told him the President Monson story. Unbeknown to me he wrote to President Monson and told him I was in the Princeton Ward. He told of this in a note and included the reply from President Monson. I have enclosed copies of the original note and letter. I also have enclosed a copy of a note from two years ago from Joe Wirthlin Jr. I will keep the original with the book and CDs.
I have had a wonderful life and it is centered around a wonderful family. Where would I be if I had not met and married Dawnie, joined and stayed active in the Church, and been sealed to four of our five children? I do not even want to think about.
This has become longer than I planned but now there is a record of these events. I can work on other things. Thanks for prompting me.
Love,
Grandpa Hayden
March 3, 2014 -Thomas S. Monson was an Apostle when I met him. Shortly after that he was called as Second Counselor in the First Presidency. On February 2, 2008 he was called as the 16th President of the Church.
Joseph B. Wirthlin was a General Authority when I met him. He was ordained an Apostle on October 10, 1986. His is quite a story. His son Joe Jr. has been a close friend of mine ever since we bought their business. He worked for Swift Independent in Salt Lake for awhile. He is now President of the New York, Utica Mission.
When we were living in Bullard, TX Joe called me from Dallas one time. Said he had wanted to see if we could get together someplace but for some reason we could not make it work. I told him then that he would be proud of me because we had put our house up for sale and as soon as it sold we were putting our papers in to serve a mission.
He said, “Dick, have your Stake President send your papers to my dad.” I really was not for that but did not say anything. Bottom line is I did have our Stake President send our papers to Elder Wirthlin and that is how we were assigned to The England London Mission. Serving there was the greatest experience of our lives.
